Right below the skin on which you place kisses lingers a constant sorrow.
Resembling residual dread upon grieving the un-encountered.
Your love feels unreal. How do I, convince me— ME?!
That I should live in the now?
That I should live in the now?
I try it…
Look for five, touch four, yada yada-
all whilst enveloped in your arms, with my eyes shut tight.
That this, right here
is home; in a way I never thought I’d know.
What reeked of love— push and pull. fights and screaming. arguments and deafening silences.
Seems to have vanished. Overpowered with the fragrance of your might.
In the wake of your love, I try count three things I can hear, two I can smell…
But is that even how it goes?
I’m left unsure of everything I’ve ever known.
Accustomed to your help, my weight which you support.
Unusual my lack of control, the mass I lent you
still pulls on me like a phantom limb but it’s not just mine anymore.
How can I love you so much that it hurts to look into your eyes
knowing the atrocities to which I can lose you?
Being with you feels sinful. An undeserved casting.
I never moved worlds, never saved anyone to have landed the role of the One, for you.